Lost?

Have you ever felt like you don't know who you are anymore? That you aren't doing all that you are meant to? That when you look in the mirror you don't recognize the person staring back at you?


If you have never felt this way you are one of the lucky few. Sadly, most of us have or will in our lives, I already have and sometimes the feeling haunts me. When it happens some of us try to hide it by acting normal or trying to convince yourself that nothings wrong. When you try to hide it, it feels like a piece of you is missing, but there is cold, fake, plastic filling in the emptiness. You feel like everything that makes you who you are is gone, that somehow you can't remember the way it felt to be you. If you bury your self in a project or work, you forget almost everything else, you don't have time for your friends, or you do things without feeling it.
For me it was the stress of impressing my parents; when I was practically perfect, they only saw the things I did wrong. I was swamped with projects, had dance three times a week, theater twice a week, got home at eight or nine most nights and I practically raised my little brother. I was twelve and didn't go to bed until two in the morning, woke up at six, and barely had time to eat, or spend time with friends. My actions became automatic, I ate because I had to, and my eyes were dead. Life went on like normal and I became used to it. Gradually the life came back to my eyes and I became less of a zombie/robot.